I mentioned recently that one of my pressing projects was to rebuild a section of fence mostly destroyed by Chipper the Psycho Pup. Last Saturday I simply could not find an excuse not to tackle that job. So I stayed in bed as long as possible and then headed out to the back yard to figure out the best way to make this repair.
Should I just dismantle the damaged section and rebuild it in place or do I build the section on the ground and then stand it up in place and secure it to the existing fence?
I decided to rebuild it in place, starting with the vertical pieces (see Dee’s comment below) along the top, middle, and bottom.
On a side-note-near-digression: I decided not to shower that morning knowing I would be sweating like a illegal writing a check, so I put on the Martin Guitars cap that Dee sent me. I normally don’t wear caps but I can’t stand how my hair looks when I don’t take a shower! The point here is that with the cap on, I didn’t see the top vertical piece of wood (again, see Dee’s comment below … she’s really beginning to tick me off!) at least three times … walking right into it and knocking myself all but senseless. You’d think after the second time, I’d know that piece of wood was there.
Another side note: While the fence was down and the gap was open, Dave (neighbor) had his dog out playing ball and Chipper was in her pen wanting to get out. I asked Dave, “Do you think they might get along?” So we decided to let them at least attempt to play together. They started off sniffing each other from nose to tail. Have you ever wondered just how advanced a society dogs might have achieved had they not been distracted with the preoccupation of sniffing other dogs?
Anyway, after sniffing for a while and giving us a false sense of security, they suddenly went after each other with a ferocity. Dave grabbed his dog by the collar and I grabbed Chipper the Psycho Pup by her hips. We quickly pulled them apart and sent them to their proper corners. So much for dog neighbors. So much for any hope this new section will somehow withstand them trying to get through it on a daily basis.
But for now, the fence is repaired and I can turn my attention to sprinkler systems.
Oh yes, the point of the blog. As I was putting up the fence, Dave said, “You know, my wife is going to insist that I stain this fence. Not just the new part, but the whole thing so it will match.”
Which brings up a corollary (whatever a corollary happens to be … just sounded right): For every project a man does, he spawns a sub-project that is equally frustrating and time consuming as the original. Which is why, for the most part, we HATE projects!
Totally unrelated: A photo from the back door of Josh and Heather’s condo on the island of Maui. Thankfully they have that vacation trip behind them and no longer have to put up with this sleezy neighborhood!
Greg England
Sounds like Dave better be in good shape or he might have a “corollary” having spawned another project.
Did anyone think to throw a set of sunglasses on the ground to distract Cujo, I mean Chipper?
I couldn’t see the pics of Josh and Heather’s “low rent” digs in Maui on my home computer. We’ll see if the District’s computers will allow the pics through.
Just tell him to tell his wife what I tell mine. Get back in the kitchen, Woman! NOT!!!
One of my college buddies recently moved to Hawaii to work as a civilian doctor for the military. Somebody has to do it.
Peace.
[Can I have your Woman's email address? Just want to send her a "quote" I think she would enjoy! It would make a great evening conversation piece for the two of you.]
Greg -
And I suppose you’ll think I’m a persnickity, pesky, out of my bounds woman (ref. Steve, above) for bringing this up . . . but the very first thing I noticed about your post (and which kept nagging me throughout), was that the three cross bar pieces of your fence section you kept referencing at the top, middle & bottom, are not, according to my highly accurate vision in looking at your photo, “vertical” pieces, but three horizontal pieces.
The rest of the fence is composed of a series of vertical pieces tightly spaced so that Chipper the Psycho Pup cannot wiggle through to once again have an illegal (in this country, if you bet money on her) dog fight with the neighbor dog.
I cannot believe that neither you (although it’s probably babysitting fatigue from the past six days) or Cecil (the math teacher, for goodness sakes!), or Steve picked up on that (I’m sure you’ll say minor) fact. It drove me nuts in reading your post.
Especially when you mentioned running into the top “vertical” piece three times because you had the Martin Guitar’s cap on that I gave you (somehow implying that it was possibly MY fault that you were so . . . uh . . . well, never mind) and could not see it from under your brim.
Just doing my part to police your blog to make it as highly accurate as possible, which is a continuing work in progress that keeps me busy and very entertained!
Cheers! (And, please do not be mad. I’m on my way back to the kitchen right now. NOT!!)
Dee
P. S. This reminds me of going with Tom to pick up the expensive piece of marine plywood for his boat hatch, somehow. Which makes me laugh, so you’ve done a great thing for me here this morning!! Believe me!!
[I probably would never make a good airline pilot, would I? I feel like I should correct the blog, but that would render this excellent comment invalid ... thanks for the heads "UP"]
Fences, Psycho Puppy and Pics of Maui.
Quite an interesting and amusing post and the previous comments are equally amusing. Dee has quite the eye for detail, makes me wonder if I should start posting blurry pictures on my blog. (Just kidding Dee) I do expect the cap may have a curse on it though. You could try it out on Psycho Puppy and see if he acts differently.
After seeing the beautiful Maui picture, all I can say is….you are lucky Josh and Heather even came home.
[What can I say about an attorney?? (Love you, Dee!) Had they taken the babies with them, they might not have.]
I feel affirmed as a woman, somehow. Although, the “ticked off” and “attorney” slings at my fragile ego were difficult to bear. And then Janice, of all people, threw in a “minor” dig against me, a fellow woman “warrior” in this game called life amongst seemingly superior men.
I mean . . . “eye for detail?” How can one not (who has ever been in school or looked at the horizon, perhaps, out on the south panhandle plains of Texas) immediately differentiate between horizontal and vertical?
As for you, Greg – I am really, REALLY happy that you did not become an airline pilot!!
Cheers, once more!!
Dee
[I should have said you were beginning to tick me off ... bless your heart ... and then it would be okay. At least in the south.]
The sniffing dogs is my favorite part of this story. My dad used to tell us that the dogs sniffed each other’s tail because they were looking for their own. He told us that a long time ago all the dogs gathered for a dance in a big barn. As they came in “back then” they would all check their tails at the front desk. During the dance, some of the hay caught fire in the barn and the dogs ran out so frantically they just grabbed whatever tail they could. Now they just go around checking to see if other dogs have their tail.
Sounds like a big “tale” to me!
I thought after reading the first paragraph, that you were going to say you were putting up a fence to cover up the view …. of the final picture. I was about to unfriend you
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