We received the following by fax yesterday. I’ve copied it verbatim …
Hello Funeral Director
How are you doing my name is catlin smith i am contacting you as funeral home.as i will like funeral service for my late father smith cole who was born on 17th May 1940 and died on 6th june 2010 who died on his business trip to ENGLAND and the remains is right now in a Mortuary in ENGLAND (WEST NORWOOD MOTUARY) and i want his remains transport back to state for immediate burial so can you do this for me..and if so get back to me with the cost for you to handle this and do you also accept credit card for payment please do get back to me with the total cost by emailing catlinsmith72@yahoo.com i will be glad to hear back from you.
Sincerely
Catlin Smith
What do you think, a scam?
Before you jump to any conclusion, consider: (1) the impeccable command of the English language, (2) the near-perfect spelling and capitalization, (3) the flawless punctuation, as well as (4) the easy flow of the run-on sentences so as not to bother us with those silly periods.
Can there be any doubt this is the real thing?!
Not to mention the late “smith cole” has been dead for five weeks and Catlin is just now contacting a funeral home in “state” to have his body returned? You would think the least she would do is update the scam to the current month.
I smell a rat … a 40-day-old corpse of a rat.
P U~~smells to me
Greg … I’ve been SO gone for the last three weeks. Ten days in the mountains followed quickly by a trip to Miami and a 3 day drive home. Ugh. I’ve fallen behind on blog reading. I won’t catch up on all of them, but yours I will.
I hope your summer is going well. I know I’m ready for things to slow down a little. I’m excited to see you’re posting again. The post “the most difficult day in your life,” hurt my heart and yes, I too smell a rat.
Blessings my brother.
[Trey, I'm honored that you read my stuff! Glad you're home ... just in time to start getting ready to go back to the dump feast! I wish I could make that trip with you.]
Oh well, some people will try anything…
Thanks for the list. I am very thankful that Mom & I had sat down & gotten all of her stuff together a few months before her death. It was a hard thing to do together, but also a good time to share.
[Yes, it's difficult, but you are right in that it brings up potentially wonderful conversations and memories. Plus it's a great time to share, again, our faith in God's promises of our forever home!]
It sounds a little fishy to me as well, however after seeing how all of my children abbreviate and disregard punctuation and spelling while texting each other there is a slight possibility that she is so accustomed to communicating in this way. Perhaps the more ridiculous part is the 40 day old corpse. it s hard 2 say.
[I mean it's like, you know ? Whatever!]
delete, delete, delete….
I am not sure the dad’s name was even right……but I have a girl who works for me with similar spelling and punctuation. The product of “home-schooling”. Not an editorial, just an observation.
[You and Steve (wallysdad) seem to come to the same conclusion. I don't text much, but when I do, mine are grammatically correct, which probably causes a lot of laughter on the part of the younger crowd. Either way, she can find another funeral home 'cause we aren't taking this bait. Had a similar "ship in" from Africa last year, but that one was clearly a hoax.]
I can smell that rat all the way over here in hot humid Oklahoma. So glad you were wearing your “rat armor.”
I’m sure you will get a lot of cheesy advice on rat extermination.
[Hey, don't knock that humidity. People pay a lot of money to have moist heat in those saunas! They even say it's healthy for you.]
Greg! I’m stunned at your cynicism and down right coldheartedness toward this grieving girl, assuming she IS a girl, in the loss of her 40 days ago. And, poor chap. Still resting, unburied, in that mortuary in ENGLAND, in case you wouldn’t recognize the country’s name unless it were in all CAPS.
Uh . . . make that “his remains (IS) in the mortuary.” I would have thought his remains “were” in the mortuary, but what do I, Who’s Who in English for 4 (straight, I might add, I did not drop out and have to go back! ha!) years in high school, know. (I know, I know . . . you, oh Cynical One, have grave doubts about my OWN abilities to use the English language and grammar, as well, but that is another prediliction of yours I shall not go into at the moment.)
Anyway . . . I am just surprised that you did not JUMP to work out a credit card payment from her. I mean, what could have gone wrong with THAT, you know?! ha!
Well . . . you’ve managed to have yet another nifty blog post just handed to you here today, Greg, rats and all. Good post. I’ll be sitting on pins and needles to hear the outcome of this sad, sudsy saga. To see if your heart bends, just a little bit, in thinking further of this poor woman’s plight (I’ve figured out that if her father was born in 1940, she is not likely TOO young – isn’t that smart deductive reasoning on my part?!) Of course, Tom’s dad was 56 when Tom was born and he has a sister 10 years younger, so I COULD be wrong.
Must go for now. Back in the sauna heat, myself, I need to run take advantage of it’s skin softening powers, and whatever other powers it provides.
Cheers!
Dee
[Dee: I wrote this blog to showcase my cynicism and downright coldheartedness!]
Father Smith Cole is dead?????? And he had a daughter???? I didn’t know he was sick!! Or sexually active!! I’m going to have to go lie down now. Poor, rotting, randy Father Smith Cole.
[Whodathunk, huh?]