I’ve seen the Ronco infomercials … those whole chickens cooking in his rotisserie oven (available with easy monthly payments!). Golden brown. Dripping with succulent juices. I wanted so much to order that puppy and try my hand at those mouth-watering recipes. After all, if you believe the hype and pitch of the infomercials, you could not go wrong … every meal would turn out perfect every time.
I’ve also sat in a local restaurant in Long Beach (Hoff’s Hut) more times than I can remember, watching them cook dozens of whole chickens at a time on their huge rotisserie oven with each bird looking just as tempting and delicious as the ones in the Ronco infomercials.
So the Mrs. and I decided to get a universal rotisserie gizmo for our grill. A universal one that is supposed to fit most grills. Saturday morning Jessica was coming down and we were going to feast on our first rotisserie chicken. Golden brown. Dripping with succulent juices.
I picked up a whole chicken Friday afternoon. $6.15. We were set. Baked beans. Fresh corn. French fries. Watermelon. Diet Dr. Pepper. An afternoon in the pool with the grandkids. It was going to be the perfect summer Saturday.
After spending most of the morning installing the rotisserie on the grill (I had to take one piece apart and rebuild it sort of backwards for it to work), I skewered that chicken, turned the heat down on low, watched it for a few minutes … pleased with the conquering of yet another project … and took off with Jessica to get a quick bite of lunch.
I know at Hoff’s Hut they cook those chickens for a few hours, so I figured our chicken would take at least 90 minutes or so. I’d check it as soon as we got back home.
I miscalculated.
When we got home less than an hour later, my chicken dinner was poultry charcoal. Remember the scene from Christmas Vacation when Clark cuts into the Christmas Turkey and it just collapses? That was my chicken. And the meat? Dry as dust.
I wouldn’t even give it to the Psycho Puppy, Chipper … hard as she begged for it.
But the good news is the rotisserie unit is still on the grill. And months from now if I should decide to try it again . . . .
I want one of those SO bad. My grill even has the infrared cooker thingy at the back of it. But my wife won’t let me get it – because, really, why do you need that when you can get a succulent, juicy, lemon-pepper rotisserie chicken at Wal-Mart for less than a 6-pack of cokes? Umm…ambience?? Pool-side parties??
Hmm… a new recipe “Crispy Rotisserie Blackened Chicken”. Somehow I think it might be a while before you are invited to be on Food Network.
Hope the next time is better!
We DID buy one a few years ago. Didn’t work like it was supposed to. We eventally gave it away……………
Around here you just buy the little pronged gizmo that holds an open can of beer in in the middle and then shove the chicken down over (I know, doesn’t sound too pleasant for the chicken!) to cook it. It DOES turn out succulent and juicy and is very tasty, (And, nope, you can’t taste the beer.)
It is had only been an hour that your chicken cooked on low heat, even though it was charcoal on the outside, I highly doubt that it was done enough in the middle of the meat of the bird. With poultry, you have to get the internal temperature up to about 175 degrees for it to be done enough to be safe to eat.
Another thing NOT to do, which you don’t really have to worry about in the high desert of southern Cal, is not to try to cook one in the winter time. The first Thanksgiving after hurricane Katrina, Tom was stuck at work for more than 72 hours straight (no sleep, you understand) and left me with clear instructions about smoking a turkey on his electric smoker (with hickory wood for “flavoring”). I put the bird on the day before – Wednesday – about noon and that sucker never even turned the slightest tinge of brown on the outside, much less cook.
You see, it was fairly cold outside, probably in the mid to low 50s, and the smoker was on our back porch, albeit facing south and east. The smoker just did not heat up! He had put it out there before he had left to go to work and I was supposed to “cook” it and then after he got home, I would help him take it out. Two days later, the lame bird was still in the smoker, kind of dingy looking, and I was out shopping for something for us to have for our little Thanksgiving dinner.
Those were extremely hard months for us and I rarely saw Tom, literally, but he DID get home to eat a small meal for Thanksgiving and we celebrated life – that we were together, that our home was intact, and that even in the midst of the hardest of times, we could be thankful for God’s blessings.
Cheers!
Dee
P. S. So, what was your replacement for your delicious rotisserie chicken, Greg? A store bought one?
Try again soon, buddy. YOU CAN DO IT!!!! Tom & I have faith in you!!
ya could have passed it off as black~in chicken
I’ve thought about buying one of those rotisserie thingys also. My friend, Janice, bought one and cooks on it all the time. Hers doesn’t connect to the grill tho. It is a countertop unit. She cooks roast, ribs and chicken in hers. Really tasty. But it also cost a good bit. I guess the really good ones do cost more than I can afford right now.
Would have loved to have been there to laugh at (I mean with) you. Know you had a good time with Jess and the babies anyway.
Sorry yours didn’t work like you had hoped. Our grill came with one (along with the infrared cooker in the rear) and it cooks perfect rotisserie chickens every time (actually 2 at a time). Not gloating or anything – well, actually I guess I am. But drop by sometime and we’ll throw a couple on the barbie.